inspiring

Right this moment we're having a sudden onset thunderstorm with rain and lightning that just cracked so hard and so close it sounded like a tree splitting in half.

So what is inspiring about this?

There's a quite handsome wasp sitting on the screen of my garret window. He has brilliant orange and gold legs and is waiting out the storm by grooming himself from antenna to wingtips. I just love it that he's taking a break with me while the rain washes down the world outside.

novel movement

I think the work with Keil Bay and going to the office last night loosened things up in relation to the novel and my recent logjam with edits. On my way home last night, once I got past the last "town" on the highway and entered the dead zone, ideas began to pop.

I had identified the "issues" out loud with my husband the night before, and I think that helped too - the editing issues that needed resolving were "out there" and yesterday's activity got me out of my head enough that the solutions could bubble up.

The first thing I did when I got in the house was write down the revelations in my little blue notebook. Then I went on to the rest of my evening, and when I got in bed, yet another revelation burst forth.

I struggled briefly - should I get up and write that one down as well? But it was a major one, and unlikely to be forgotten in the night, so I went to sleep.

Today I've done my Pilates and am hoping that the day's chores and time with horses keeps the lines open so I can work on some of these things this evening, on the page.

wednesday work-outs

This morning Keil Bay was intent on standing at his stall door after breakfast, and since it is hot and I didn't really want to tack him up, I took him in the arena to play on the ground.

When he realized I was planning to do ground work, he resisted a little, but once in the arena he perked up and I did some free-lunging, with my primary goal being to get him landing really well up front, heel first, and to carry himself with some balance and lightness.

He initially used the entire arena, going in his own figure-8 pattern around and then changing directions across the diagonals. It was interesting to see him form this pattern on his own - if he gets bored or simply doesn't want to play, he will often get hung up in the corners. Today he didn't.

After about 15 minutes of walk/trot/canter, he decided he was done, but I wanted him to push a bit further and do more of his big trot. I realized today, not a total revelation, but more like a reiteration, that when he does his big beautiful trot he is landing heel first AND moving with balance, lightness, and ease. Duh! But it occurred to me that by not working him more at this gait/frame, which he does quite naturally on his own, I'm contributing to any problems. When he uses his back, lands correctly, and carries himself, it's better for every part of his body.

So I asked him to do more of that. The really fascinating part of this exercise was that when I asked him to push on and do more, he balked for just a moment but then he clicked into gear. Instead of using the entire arena in a big figure-8 pattern, he began to lunge around me using about 1/2 the arena, doing a darn good circle on his own volition. He even changed directions and did everything the other way. We got very crisp up-transitions and more big trot, and then I let him canter to stretch out some and then cooled off with turns on the forehand and haunches.

When I opened the gate to the paddock so he could head on out, he didn't leave! He just stood there licking and chewing. It was a really nice end to some work in the hot sun, which is admittedly not my favorite time to be in the arena.

Just as I convinced Keil Bay to leave the arena, Rafer Johnson squeezed his way in, and then Cody and Apache Moon came in too. They got some work with my daughter, who set up a few jumps and let them walk and trot for a bit before moving them into cantering these verticals.

Rafer Johnson is a jumping machine! I have never seen anything like it. He takes the jumps like a little eventer. And he will literally push his way through the gap in the gate and the post in order to do this.

Speaking of work-outs, it's time to get back on my own schedule and alternate between yoga, Pilates mat work, and the gym. I think today I'll do Pilates.

august

I'm finding it difficult to believe it's already August - the summer has gone by quickly for me. But the signs are here.

The deep blue skies that presage autumn.

Butterflies everywhere!

The huge horseflies that are like small birds.

The pony's annual grumpiness. (I'm hoping his saliva test yields some insight into this phenomenon)

Muscadines are on the way to being ripe. This year they're along our front porch and in the back field, where you can ride underneath the vines and pick them.

A manuscript that wants to be queried but isn't quite ready. (last night I actually closed the document and opened the doc for the THIRD novel - with some kind of desperate hope that perhaps it had magically edited itself and was ready to send out - no such luck)

Fleas (help is on the way)

A subtle but definite pull inside that is me longing for the change of season - changing colors, crisp nights, the call of geese.


*******


Update on Keil Bay and his herbal regimen:

Keil Bay and I both had hot stone massage today and H. and I were astounded at the change in his demeanor.

He loves the bodywork but tends to fidget and fuss until the "right" area gets addressed. This is an okay thing - but I have always wanted him to relax and enjoy the entire process. Today he did.

He was waiting at the barn door for H. when she arrived. He said hello and then planted himself. I sat in a chair and held the lead line, but he really didn't need one. With the first contact he was licking, chewing, rolling his eyes around, yawning, and doing incredible yoga stretches each time she stopped to get new stones.

He didn't have to smell them, taste them, or otherwise even see the stones - he just stood there and opened up to the massage.

At one point her hands were so deep behind his scapula I could only see the wrists. He's never allowed such deep work, and he didn't fuss once about flies or the heat or the hour standing still.

I'm convinced the herbs are having tremendous effects on the way he feels.

We have two hot days coming up and I may not ride until they pass - but later this week we will be back to regular work and I am so eager to see how it goes.

quotes to self

Mamie reminded me that I have all these quotes and chinese fortune cookie fortunes and poems taped to the inside of my laptop.

It's a good time to read them and remind myself of what I've put there.


But I don't want to go among mad people! said Alice. Oh, you can't help it, said the Cat. We're all mad here. (Lewis Carroll)

Your hard efforts will bring you fame. (chinese fortune cookie from 3/25/2000)

Beauty will save the world. (F. Dostoyevsky)

You are on the verge of something big. (chinese fortune cookie from 2/23/2004)


It is time for all the heroes to go home
if they have any, time for all of us common ones
to locate ourselves by the real things
we live by.

Far to the north, or indeed in any direction,
strange mountains and creatures have always lurked-
elves, goblins, trolls, and spiders: -we
encounter them in dread and wonder,

But once we have tasted far streams, touched the gold,
found some limit beyond the waterfall,
a season changes, and we come back, changed
but safe, quiet, grateful.

Suppose an insane wind holds all the hills
while strange beliefs whine at the traveler's ears,
we ordinary beings can cling to the earth and love
where we are, sturdy for common things.

-William Stafford


The object of your desire comes closer. (chinese fortune cookie from 11/8/2003)

A chance meeting opens new doors to success and friendship. (chinese fortune cookie not dated)

you are going to change your present line of work. (chinese fortune cookie from 5/2004)

Good things are coing to you in due course of time. (chinese fortune cookie from 5/2004)


All rivers run full to the sea; those who are apart are brought together, the lost ones are redeemed; the dead come back to life; the perfectly blue days that have begun and ended in golden dimness continue, immobile and accessible.

-Mark Helprin


Assurance

You will never be alone, you hear so deep
a sound when autumn comes. Yellow
pulls across the hills and thrums,
or the silence after lightning before it says
its names - and then the clouds' wide-mouthed
apologies. You were aimed from birth:
you will never be alone. Rain
will come, a gutter filled, an Amazon,
long aisles - you never heard so deep a sound,
moss on rocks, and years. You turn your head
that's what the silence meant: you're not alone
The whole wide world pours down.

-William Stafford